(scene opens in pristine and artistically eclectic dinning room. Table set with fine china.)
Me: Hey K, that blue lamp you have by the t.v. I love it. I want some of those mosaic glass lamps so bad.
Sister: I know, aren’t they fabulous?
Brother: (laughs) But you cannot have nice things.
Me: (wistfully) No, I cannot have nice things. I have a khalasar instead.
(four children and two dogs run through the room, yelling about chocolate)
Sister: Time to eat?