(scene opens in moderately clean kitchen)

Me: (washing dishes at sink)
Beta: (comes up with small desert plate, plain cheesecake with a single bite taken)
Me: Want some cherry on top?
Beta: (hesitantly) Uh…no. I don’t like it.
Me: What’s wrong with it?
Beta: It doesn’t taste like cheese.
Me: (laughing) Honey, its cheesecake not cheese.
Beta: (explosive) What manic decided it was a good idea to put sugar in cheese?!
Me: Its a sweet cheese! Its supposed to be soft and sweet and creamy and used in desserts!
Beta: (fumes in outrage)
Me: (waves a wet hand) Put it on the counter, I’ll eat it when I’m done.

(Beta stalks off screen)

Husband: (watching from other doorway) The best part of that was him thinking he was being served a wedge of hard cheese for desert and being okay with it.
Me: Now I know what to give him tomorrow.