(scene opens in apocalypse parlor)
Husband: (enters from the kitchen) I have a video conference call. Do I look okay?
Me: (looks up from lap top) Well, I love that color shirt on you, the tie is fabulous and the hat really brings it together)
(boys collectively turn to see Husband wearing a black octopus hat)
Beta: Now you need to wear the Plague Doctor mask.
Me: No, he needs to ration them out.
Alpha: Next time you can wear the Moose Hat.
Husband: Wore that last time.
Beta: You can borrow our Rainbow Poop Hat.
Beta: Why not?
Me: Too unprofessional.
Husband: (turns, nods, tossing a tentacle over his shoulder, exits stage left)