(scene opens in church rec room, Cub Scout meeting in progress)
Delta: (whispering) Mom, I need a drink.
Me: (takes him by the hand, leaves the room)
(cut scene to hallway with an archaic drinking fountain mounted to the brick wall)
Delta: (looks at it, looks at Carrot) Do we have a water bottle?
Me: (confused) No. We don’t need a water bottle. Just drink.
Delta: (looks at it, looks at Carrot)
Me: (pushes button, leans forward, slurps up the arc of water) See?
Delta: (delightedly steps up and drinks enough water to drown an elephant) Mom! That was fun! I’ve never drank water like that!
Me: How have you never used a drinking fountain before?
Delta: School only has places to fill bottles. (runs back to rec room)
Me: (dies a little)