(scene opens in dark car, Pandora Radio playing a commercial for Dexter)
Alpha: (derisively) Who names a serial killer Dexter. That’s a ridiculous name.
Me: (absently) Dexter is the opposite of Sinister. Sinister is the left, Dexter is the right, which is why if you can use both hands it’s called ambidextrous. Dexter is a serial killer who only hunts serial killers. He’s on the right side of sinister.
Alpha: (long silence) And where on the internet did you get that?
Me: I didn’t. I came up with it on my own. But I bet someone else on the internet came up with it too.
Alpha: (mockingly) Oh, look I’m making up word meanings.
Me: Do it! Look it up! Look up what dexter means.
Me: Did you find it?
Alpha: No. I decided to believe you.
Me: (shocked) Oh now you decide to start listening to me?
Alpha: Well, you’re the one making things up, seems easier just to let you go on.
Me: You know how you get all this random knowledge? Read. Read a lot. Read tons. Get yourself some accidental knowledge. Then you, too, will also see the deeper hidden meanings of things.
Alpha: Or I could just sit here and laugh over memes showing a pumpkin carved into a troll face. (cut scene to shitty meme on phone)
Me: (gives up) Despair. You make me. I am full.