Frickin’ Fabulous

(scene opens in Tricoci University, students working on clients and mannequins)

Me: (Flounces to counter, resplendent in galaxy colored hair, followed by compliments and murmurs of approval from students and instructors)
Old Lady: (turns to look who’s behind her at the counter)
Me: (smiles brilliantly)

(scene repeats several times, Old Lady looking back then away, trying to hide a smile, finishes up making her appointment)

Old Lady: (finally) I just wanted to tell you, you look like a unicorn.
Me: (delightedly sharing Old Lady’s glee) I know! It was the effect I was going for!
Old Lady: (surprised, recoils) Really!? (shakes her head in disapproval and totters off)
Me: (WTF look)
Fabulous Host: (muttering to himself) Like that would have happened on accident.
Me: Right? By the way, love the nails.
FH: Thanks! (waggles inch long glitter acrylics honed to a deadly point)

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All the colors

(scene opens in gloomy tossed dinning room)

Delta: Batman, mommy! Batman!
Me: What? (sees Delta with hair clip and pink baby blanket) Oh! Okay!
Gamma: (from under the table) What does he want?
Me: (putting blanket around Delta’s shoulders) He wants to be Batman, so I’m putting a cape on him.
Gamma: Batman doesn’t wear pink.
Me: It’s Pride. He’s Pride Batman. Pride Batman can wear pink.
Gamma: That’s not a thing.
Me: You wanna bet?

(scene ends with Delta zooming around the room in naught but diaper and pink cape)

Camouflage

(scene opens at the park)

Me: (sitting on bench, running fingers through Gammas’s two-toned hair) The blue is starting to fade. I like the slate blue of it, it looks like stone. Maybe you’re an Earth Witch.
Gamma: (resigned patience) My hair isn’t stone, mommy.
Me: If we do the color again, what color do you want to do? Pink? Red? Green?
Gamma: Black.
Me: (oddly disappointed) Black? Why would you want black?
Gamma: Because I walk through shadow.
Me: Oh. I guess that’s okay then.